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Sometimes it stings the soul

...mrtaylorduck, let's place a halt to the binge drinking. for obviously it's not helping since you are speaking with us. and as for the arbitrary "booty calls" (could this be why you are going through this trauma in the first place) stop allowing folks to use you... and you stop using them. you say that you are 30 years old, well actually in this day and age.. that makes you a (20 yo) do you get it. it's ok to cry a little and be upset my buddy. but at some point you shall need to just grow up, and start to mend your self esteem.
stop worrying about being short and having long hair. are you kidding... this is 2014, live and let live. talk to your parents, acquire a little faith... trust me, you shall be just fine.
No way bro.

 
This isn't meant to be trite, but...if you aren't content with, and by yourself, you won't be content if this one, or another one, is in your life. You derive your value, your self-esteem by who and what you are, not who you're with. Find ways to make yourself busy (NOT drinking a lot!) and you'll be surprised at how quickly you get back on an even keel. One other thing...do NOT go looking for a replacement. You'll never find "the right one" while you're looking. The best ones are happy accidents that catch you by surprise. Spend some time treating yourself to help you get over things. There...all that advice, and I don't even charge for it.

 
Current one actually not rebound. Dated around after old flame breakup. Finally settled with current one. Then old flame out of the blue early last year texted he loved me. I never responded back. But was in NYC for work and wanted to catch up. There was lots of chemistry like before. I have more in common with old flame than current one.

Not to intrude, but it's not how much you have in common - but - what you have in common.

My better half and I are polar opposites on a lot of things. Yet, on the things that really count, she and I are right there together.

 
I have been married 24 years and the one thing is our love and firm belief in God. My advice would be

To find a church you like and work on your relationship with God. Your life will get better. Stay strong brother.

 
I dont know if you are ketch or not. But you are certainly an over the top troll.

 
Mrtaylorduck...NO woman is worth the incredible pain and loneliness that, inevitably, follows a breakup with somebody you were with for a long time. Sadly for us men, we realize this only after we have suffered for a while. Having ben through some bad shit myself, I can tell you that the thing that worked for me was "compartmentalization". I immersed myself in my work (thankfully I have a job that I simply love), working nights, weekends, holidays, and I was able to deal with it. I didn't try to get drunk or anything but I worked until I was mentally exhausted (I'm a physicist...what I do requires a lot of focused thinking and creativity). Sure I cried but not as much as I would have otherwise. I got through 4 months doing this. My productivity soared and, at the end of 4 months, I was left with a dull ache but ready to move on.

BTW...some poster here went through 4 marriages in 41 years...dude, are you simply the most extreme class of masochist or what? After 1 marriage, I'd have other partners but never marry one again.

 
Not to intrude, but it's not how much you have in common - but - what you have in common.
My better half and I are polar opposites on a lot of things. Yet, on the things that really count, she and I are right there together.
Thanks SHL for the advice. Sigh.....Love is complicated, at least for me. I better figure out what I want first. Maybe it's me. LOL. Perhaps I also enjoy the chase.

 
Great country and western lines for $200 Alex????

If it's true. . .take the advice. ..look forward not back (yes I know. .easy to say harder to do ..been there done that). . .

 
Great country and western lines for $200 Alex????

If it's true. . .take the advice. ..look forward not back (yes I know. .easy to say harder to do ..been there done that). . .

Just play the C&W song backwards and everything is back in order. :)

 
Go outside. The problem is not you or her at this point. It is your inability to put things in perspective. We have all been where you are. You have got to allow your idea of her to settle down. That is all that this is about, it is in you where the struggle is.

And even though I don't know you it is obvious that you have many friends here. Count your blessings and give yourself a break. Emotions are not logical.

 
Well I am like a black guy trying to get a cab in Harlem at 3am. Chicks are not stopping to take a look. It sucks. I'm short, have really long hair, and really short. It not a great draw. We'll see what happens. I really thought this last chick was the one.
I already blew it with the girl I shoulda married. That was years ago though. Sad Sad Song Saturday.

Chicks don't look for looks bro. They want to laugh. Make fun of yourself. If your short call attention to it and laugh about it.

 
Just remember it will hit you one day.....Like me, I "git" Married and my women was my slave and one day when I asked at dinner for her to get me some more tea------- it just did not sound right and I jumped up and got my own tea and filled her glass up.

Now we have been married for 49 years and hitting 50 years of marriage. You find what you are looking for when you do not know you was looking. Keep your head up and it will come. HOOK'EM and stay with it.

 
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